ABIGAIL (2024)
a review by Evan Landon
It's astounding how these kind of movies are the ones that get the green light these days from major motion pictures, but hey, I ain't complaining! This nice little romp is just what the world needed to wash the taste of all those reboots and sequels with thousands of pencil pushers changing a fun picture into something it is not. That is EXACTLY why I said it's astounding that it got the green light.
It would not spoil anything to tell you what this movie is about because it basically tells you going into it, even in the trailers, which some people took exception to. In this case, I do not think that is the case.
A team of six mercenaries with their own separate abilities kidnap a 12 year-old ballerina and are tasked with watching her for 24 hours, then they will be paid a $50 million ransom. Sounds simple, right? Well, not if the 12 year-old ballerina is a centuries-old vampire! What ensues is a cat and mouse game covering a mansion that twists and turns more than the plot even attempts to do.
You see, in movies like this, you are always facing an uphill battle because the story and characters are what are deemed paramount. Or universal. I should say “universal” because they are the ones that distributed it. You could say that this movie suffers from that, but I don't think so because once you realize what kind of movie this is, it really does not take anything away from it. The characters are not very rich or deep, but they solve that in the very beginning of the script when it is revealed that the six mercenaries do not know each other, so back stories are not really important. They are all just greedy. Problem solved!
Once this movie gets going about halfway in, it really is held together with a lot of fun in ways the 5 most interesting characters make this whole thing work. The dialogue is drab, but poignant, sometimes hilarious. The acting is sub-par, but that is not why one would sit down and watch this. The special effects and gore are top notch though, so once that kicks in, you won't even know where the time went.
Radio Silence Productions initially started writing the film almost immediately after the SAG-AFTRA strike in April 2023, then casted and started filming almost immediately afterwards. The excellent director duo of Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett were tapped, as well as screenwriter Guy Busick, who had all worked on Ready or Not and the new Scream movies to great acclaim.
With a budget of $28 million against a box office of $35.6 million, it would be a huge stretch to call this one a success, but I have a feeling this one will have some legs in the horror, cult classic circles for a long time.
The final words in the film are a simple “What the fuck?” Yes. What the fuck, indeed, movie. What the fuck, indeed.
3.5 out of 5